Anything worth having is worth working for. It took me a while to figure that out, but now I live with that thought subconsciously embedded in everything I do.
Family, friends, work; the thought process applies in all aspects of life – for me though, it couldn’t be better suited to travel. Especially the type of travel we have planned. It is just over 5 months until we are due to board our first flight to Delhi and it’s scary. The thought of leaving behind everything I have worked for up until now. The job, the me, the relationships. Everything that everything required; the effort, the pain and by god the difficulty, scares me. I have grown to learn that there is abso-bloody-lutely nothing wrong with feeling like that. I would worry if it didn’t scare me.
As the days roll by, my stomach feels a little sicker and I question my decisions a little more. Yet I still long for the flight, for the change, the opportunity. I’m not searching for myself. I know who I am. I know what I believe in. I’m searching for experiences that will enrich me and my perspective. I’m looking for people that can teach me things I’ve never thought about learning. Sites that will show me things I never thought of seeing. I’ll miss them, I’ll miss all of them; the old, the new, the re-kindled. I hope I’ll be better for them afterwards, because I know they’ll be better for me and that is where it all starts and stops. With them.
It’s not easy leaving ‘life’ behind – nobody said it would be, but seizing the opportunity is more important than being scared. So, thank you to the person who fills me with confidence, in myself and in others, without belief, there is nothing. Thank you to the person who makes me laugh until I cry and question what I’m doing, without you I wouldn’t be scared. Thank you to me, for being so utterly inquisitive that just being isn’t enough, without you there is no living. And that, is what it is all about. Living.
We are all spoon fed a way of living our life. Going against that indoctrinated approach is brave, not many people can, even fewer will. I want to be one of the few. The few that chase their dream. The ones I admire. All the lessons I have learnt; putting in the effort, putting up with the pain and putting aside the difficulty should help, but remaining scared. Remaining scared. That’s what will give me the best chance of making it. Of being the best I can possibly be and never taking anything for granted; always and always.
Big decisions have to be made, ones that completely transform our lives. The triangle of fear is real, but choosing your own path means it is always worth it.